Step away from the sick (July 28, 2008)

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James born June 2, 2007. Our second baby lost on April 28, 2008. Our third baby was lost on Sept. 18, 2008
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Step away from the stick
Posted Monday, July 28, 2008 1:23 PM

I've made a momentous decision. I've decided that until I can perfect time travel technology and go back in time to make my 20 year-old self do the whole POAS check thing, I am not allowed to pee on a stick. This may result in a baby falling out of me sometime in the near future. Because I am done with testing.

When I was 20, late for my period and took an HPT, I took it, waited the appropriate length of time, looked, no second line, threw it away, done....not pregnant.

This the ideal POAS form and the form any woman ttc has difficulty achieving.

Flash forward six years and it looks like this: pee in cup (in case you need the pee to test again on another hpt in the event of a faint line), dip pee in cup, watch pink color flow across window, set it down and walk away, determine not to look, look again thirty seconds later, set back down, walk out of room, pretend to occupy yourself with something else, go back in look at test, no second line, maybe if I hold it up to the light, maybe at an angle, is that something? looks grayish, but maybe there is color....set test down, go into other room again, go right back for test. Perhaps the lighting is off in the bathroom? Stand under skylight, hold at different angles, wish that evap line was not such an obvious evap line. Sit down, get on computer, blog about your neurosis, occasionally check stick which is next to you in case it changed its mind.

I may be a much more capable woman, mother, teacher, wife, etc now that I would have been six years ago, but damn, my twenty year-old self could pee on a stick